Anticapitalist Business Budgeting Starts at Home: Why You Need a Personal Budget First

The Unexpected Reason You’re Avoiding a Business Budget (And What to Do Instead)

Let’s talk about a very real, very common roadblock I see over and over again: You know you “should” have a business budget, but somehow, it just never gets done.

Why?

Not because you're lazy. Not because you don’t care. Not because you're bad at math or disorganized or allergic to spreadsheets (though if you are, that’s valid).

The number one reason I see folks avoid creating a business budget—especially folks who care about justice, equity, and building businesses in alignment with their values—is this:

To make a real, grounded-in-reality business budget, you first need a personal or household budget.
And to do that, you often need to have a conversation with your partner or co-living human about money.

And those conversations? Whew. They’re a whole thing.

It makes sense, right? A business budget only works if it helps you generate enough income to actually live. And in order to figure out how much you need to pay yourself, you need to know what your personal expenses look like. That means looking closely at your household spending, your income sources, your needs and goals—and for many of us, that means navigating a whole history of money stories, interpersonal dynamics, and deeply personal values.

Ethical Budgeting Starts at Home

If you’re building a business rooted in justice—whether you call it a solidarity economy, a post-capitalist vision, or just trying not to replicate the extractive practices you’ve seen in mainstream business—then ethical budgeting becomes a core practice.

But ethical budgeting isn’t just about your business. It starts at home.

If you don’t know how much you need to live, it’s nearly impossible to make a business budget that’s aligned with reality. That’s where so many of my clients get stuck: they want to practice ethical budgeting in their business, but they haven’t yet mapped out what “enough” looks like for their actual life.

And often, they’re afraid to find out.

According to a 2023 survey by NerdWallet, nearly 70% of Americans do not have a household budget they actively use. That number is even higher among people who grew up in poverty, have experienced financial trauma, or were never taught how to manage money.

So if you're feeling resistance—know that you are so not alone.

Two Types of Money Resistance

In my work with radical small business owners, I’ve noticed that people who avoid budgeting generally fall into one of two camps:

Person #1: You HATE looking at money

And I mean hate. Maybe you grew up with financial insecurity, had caregivers who argued about money constantly, or learned early on that money = shame. Maybe numbers make your brain hurt. Maybe looking at your bank account causes a mini panic attack. Maybe you’ve internalized the idea that being “bad with money” is a moral failing (it’s not).

For folks in this camp, I want to gently invite you to join my Liberatory Finance series. It's a free to low cost 4-part workshop for small business owners, creatives, and radical humans who want to practice ethical budgeting without giving in to the scarcity and shame of capitalism. We unpack the hard stuff—your history, your values, your needs—and build a budget that actually feels good. We talk about how to be anti capitalist and still pay your rent.

It’s basically business therapy with spreadsheets. You’ll like it.

But this post? This one is for the other group.

Person #2: You’re fine with budgeting—but your partner isn’t

You’re into it. You like a good spreadsheet. You’d love to know what you’re working with so you can create a business budget that’s actually useful. You want your business to reflect your values. You want to do anticapitalist business budgeting that centers care and consent.

But your beloved? Your roommate? Your co-parent? Your spouse?

They’re person #1. And they want nothing to do with this conversation.

So what do you do?

Let’s talk strategy.

Step One: Own the Labor, Claim the Power (An Ethical Budgeting Perspective)

First things first: it’s totally okay if this becomes your project. Not every bit of labor in a home needs to be split 50/50. If your partner handles the meal planning or the laundry or the 2 a.m. toddler wakeups, maybe you take the lead on ethical budgeting. That’s fair. That’s teamwork.

Plus—real talk—when you’re the one managing the budget, you get to build it exactly how you want. You get to design the categories, choose the tools, and create something that supports your values. That’s powerful.

This isn’t about control—it’s about clarity. About building something rooted in your values and then inviting your beloved to engage.

Step Two: How to Be Anti Capitalist in a Partnership—Start with Consent

If you’re going to do this together, you need them to be willing. Not hyped. Not spreadsheets-are-my-love-language excited. Just open. Just willing to be in the conversation.

Here’s a gentle script to start the conversation:

Hey, I’ve been thinking a lot about our finances lately—not from a place of panic, but because I really want to understand what we need in order to feel stable and supported. I’d love to build a household budget—not to micromanage or stress us out, but to give us some clarity. I’m happy to take the lead on this and do most of the tracking and setup if that feels ok with you. But I’d love for us to be on the same page and talk through what we both want and need. Would you be open to that?

If they say yes? Great. Move on to step three.
If they hesitate? Let them sit with it. Sometimes the resistance is rooted in shame, fear, or overwhelm—not refusal. Be kind. Keep the door open.

Step Three: Tools for Anticapitalist Business Budgeting (Why I Recommend YNAB)

There are lots of tools out there, but my favorite for ethical budgeting is YNAB (You Need A Budget). You get a free month using that link, and here’s why I love it:

• It’s pretty (I’m shallow; aesthetics help)

• It auto-imports from your credit cards and bank accounts

• It has machine learning that makes future categorizing way easier

• It’s easy to print or share reports with your partner

• It forces you to give every dollar a job—no vague “extra” money just floating around

Ethical budgeting requires real transparency and clarity—and YNAB makes that easier. Plus, it works beautifully for both personal and anticapitalist business budgeting. Win-win.

Step Four: Setting Up Your Ethical Budget—One Category at a Time

Don’t try to do this all in one sitting. Give yourself a week or two to really build out your categories, link your accounts, and input your recurring expenses.

Here are a few YNAB setup tips:

• Name your categories in ways that reflect your values. Instead of “Savings,” you might write “Mutual Aid & Future Freedom.” Instead of “Entertainment,” try “Joyful Living.” It’s your budget—make it yours.

• Create a buffer category. Life happens. Ethical budgeting doesn’t mean pretending surprise expenses don’t exist. Build in flexibility from the jump.

• Include care work. Do you financially support loved ones? Pay for therapy or childcare? Those are real, important expenses. Include them.

• Track for at least 4 weeks before looping in your partner deeply. This gives you data and clarity. It also gives you time to tweak your process.

Step Five: Host a Liberatory Budget Date 

Once you’ve got a month of data, don’t just drop it in your partner’s lap like a bill collector. Make the experience inviting. Set the mood. Make it something you'd actually want to do again.

Ideas:

• Cozy night in with tea and snacks

• Early afternoon coffee date while the kids are at daycare (my personal favorite)

• A walk around the neighborhood followed by a living room debrief

• A mellow playlist and comfy couch vibes

And don’t stop there.
Set a recurring Liberatory Budget Date during the first week of every month. Why the first week? Because it gives you time to reflect on last month’s spending and still make meaningful changes to this month’s categories. Don’t wait until the 25th to realize your grocery budget needs adjusting.

Put the dates on your shared calendar for the rest of the year. Make them non-negotiable. This is your liberation practice, not your punishment.

Step Six: Monthly Review—Ask These 3 Ethical Budgeting Questions

Before you sit down with your partner, take a moment to review the budget on your own. Pour a cup of coffee or tea, sit somewhere comfy, and ask yourself these three questions:

1. What went well this past month?

2. What could have gone better?

3. What do I think we could try next month?

This step is huge. It helps you stay grounded and solution-focused—and it gives you something concrete to bring into the conversation, instead of just vibes and numbers.

Step Seven: Talk Like Teammates

Now for the conversation itself: This is where the tone you set matters. We're not trying to win an argument. We're trying to co-create a tool that supports both of you.

So when you talk about what you spent and what you might change, lean into "we" language and avoid blame. You’re not reporting someone to HR—you’re co-piloting the ship.

Here are some sentence swap examples that can make a huge difference:

• ✅ “The household spent $300 on clothing this month. Do we think we’ll need that much again next month?”
  ❌ “Why are you always buying new clothes?”

• ✅ “Looks like we spent about $120 on takeout in June. That’s above our usual. Want to talk about what was going on that week?”
  ❌ “You ate out again?”

• ✅ “Groceries came in at $800, which is more than we budgeted. Let’s talk about what happened there—maybe prices went up, or maybe we need to increase that category?”
  ❌ “You need to stop buying the fancy cheese.”

• ✅ “It looks like we’re spending about $200/month on coffees at Scout. Our current budget only allows for $75. Do you want to brainstorm some other ways we could get that same joy and also meet our spending goals?”
  ❌ “We can’t afford this much coffee. What were you thinking?”

See the difference?

This isn’t about “catching” someone doing something wrong. It’s about ethical budgeting as a relational, liberatory practice. You’re gathering data, offering insight, and creating space for dialogue—not shame.

And don’t forget—spending money doesn’t make someone irresponsible. In many households, one person does the grocery runs or buys all the kids’ clothes, and the numbers will reflect that. That doesn’t mean they’re “spending too much.” It means they’re doing labor that deserves to be resourced.

Budgeting as a Practice of Anticapitalist Business Building

This is what anticapitalist business budgeting looks like in real life: not just spreadsheets and categories, but conversation, consent, care, and clarity.

When you and your partner commit to ethical budgeting—starting at home—you create the conditions for your business to thrive in a values-aligned way. You give your business budget something solid to stand on. You learn how to be anti capitalist not just in theory, but in the day-to-day flow of your household finances.

And when things get wobbly (because they will), you don’t spiral. You meet for your Liberatory Budget Date. You look at the numbers. You talk it through. You course-correct. Together.

One Last Invitation: Learn How to Be Anti Capitalist With Your Budget

If this is bringing up a lot for you—if you’re person #1, or if person #2 is starting to get overwhelmed—come join me in Liberatory Finance.

We unpack all of this. We talk about ethical budgeting from a post-capitalist lens. We build personal and business budgets that don’t feel extractive. And we make space for grief, confusion, joy, and clarity.

You deserve that kind of relationship with money.
You deserve that kind of relationship with your partner.
And your business? It deserves a budget that reflects the world you're trying to build.

Let’s make it real.